HELLO , CHAPS... TIME FOR A STORY (100% REALTIME IMPROVISING)!!: ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A HAMSTER CALLED KURT. KURT WASN'T LIKE ALL THE OTHER HAMSTERS. HE COULD JUMP MORE THAN 2 METERS IN ONE JUMP AND RESIST ALL SORTS OF SILLY RADIATION. ONE DAY KURT WAS WALKING DOWN THE STREET WHEN HE SUDDENLY HEARD A CRIE FOR HELP IN THE DISTANCE. OH GOSH, KURT THOUGHT, MAYBE ITS A NICE LOOKING HAMSTRESS (?) IN TROUBLE. -I MUST HELP HER! HE RAN AS FAST AS HIS SMALL LEGGS COULD CARRY HIM. SUDDENLY HE STOPPED! -BUT WHAT IF IT IS A SETUP? BUT IT WAS TOO LATE! OUT FROM A HOUSE CAME SOME UGLY LOOKING GUYS ARMED WITH KARLSSONS GLUE! OH NO! KARLSSONS GLUE IS THE ONLY THING THAT CAN HARM OUR HERO! BUT KURT HAD GOTTEN A NEW DEFENCE WEAPON WICH WAS DEVELOPED BY HIS VERY GOOD FRIEND, MR BAP OF TETRAGON. FROM THE FUR KURT TOOK HIS ANTI-GLUE-GUN. -HOLY LEMMINGS, THE UGLY LOOKING GUYS CRIED IN FEAR. 2 SECONDS LATER THEY CRIED IN PAIN... ONCE AGAIN HAD KURT THE ALMIGHTY PROVED HIS POWER TO THE WORLD. BUT KURT COULDN'T FORGET THE CRIES FOR HELP THAT HE HAD HEARD. -MAYBE THE UGLY ONES KIDNAPPED SOMEBODY AND USED HER AS A HOOK FOR ME... I MUST GO AND RESCUE HER! SAID AND DONE! KURT WENT UP TO ONE OF THE UGLY ONES STILL ALIVE AND KICKED HIM ON HIS NUTS. -WHERE'S THE GIRL?!? -UUHH, IT WAS BENGT ASTERLIND (HAJK,VEBOA&SOLSTAKAFE) WHO KIDNAPPED HER. IT WAS TO TRAP YOU BUT BENGAN FOUND OUT THAT SHE WAS SO SEXY THAT HE KEPT HER. -CHOP A BABY! WHERE ARE THEY NOW?!? -HE TOOK HER TO THE OLD NUCELAR PLANT. BUT HE IS CRAZY! THERE'S LOADS OF RADIATION THERE....OAAGVD..I'M DYING.. OURGH! -HOLY UNDERWEAR! I GOTTA HURRY! THE OLD PLANT HAD BEEN CLOSED FOR SEVERAL YEARS AND RUMOURS SAID THAT IT WAS LEAKING DANGEROUS THINGS. WHEN KURT ARRIVED HE STARTED TO PLAN HIS ACTIONS VERY CAREFULLY. HE KNEW THAT BENGT WAS INDEED A VERY DIABOLIC PERSON. NOW HERE WAS A REAL TASK (?) FOR THE SECOND COOLEST HAMSTER (ONLY MINE IS COOLER!) IN THE WORLD! KURT HEADED FOR THE ENTRANCE. HE KNEW IT COULD BE VERY RISKY. LIKE A STORWIND HE KICKED IN THE DOOR, JUMPED BACKWARDS AND SAW THE BIG BUCKET FULL OF TETRA-CLORID-ACID EMPTY ITSELF ON THE SPOT THAT HE 1 SECOND ERLIER HAD BEEN STANDING. -THAT WAS A CLOSE ONE, HE SIGHED AND SHOUTED: - I AM AFTER YOU NOW, BENGT! INSIDE THE PLANT WAS BENGT STANDING IN THE MIDDLE OF A GIGANTIC ROOM. TIED TO A CHAIR SAT HULDA, THE KIDNAPPED GIRL. -YOU'LL NEVER GET AWAY WITH THIS, YOU MONSTER! HA HA HA , SAID BENGT. HA HA HO HO, HE SAID. -I HAVE KILLED THE SUPER-HAMSTER (ALTHOUGH WE KNOW HE IS ALIVE!) AND I WILL TAKE YOUR VIRGINITY RIGHT HERE IN FRONT OF THE AUDIENCE! -OH NO, NOT THAT!, SHOUTED HULDA! BUT THEN KURT ENTERED THE ROOM! -HJO! YOUR TIME IS UP MAN!, HE SAID. -BUT, BUT I THOUGHT YOUR WERE DEAD! -YOU WERE WRONG SUCKER! AND WITH THESE WORDS HE THROW A MIGHTY BLOW WICH HIT BENGT IN THE STOMACH. BENGT, WHO FELL BACKWARDS INTO A BARREL WITH TOXIC WASTE STARTED TO MUTATE INTO A BP GASPUMP. THEN DID KURT UNTIE HULDA BUT SHE WAS SO UGLY THAT HE WENT HOME TO WATCH TV INSTEAD OF DOING HORNY THINGS TO HER. THE EVIL BENGT ASTERLIND WAS NEVER EVER SEEN AGAIN... SNIPP SNAPP SNUT. SO WAS THE SAGA OVER. HAHA BY MR BAP 910331